After returning to my quiet Tennessee town recently after visiting family in San Diego, I realized how much I treasure silence. My sister’s house blazes with activity—dogs, grandkids, people … noise. I came home to what I call the peaceful side of the world. Rolling hills, lightning bugs, afternoon rainstorms, and definitely fewer people.
Every time I return to San Diego, I forget how much louder it is. Yet, when I lived there, I never noticed. I was just part of it.
Last blog, we talked about what brings you joy? An ongoing question in my life. Mostly because it is so easy to let things creep in that are joyless or suck the joy out of a situation. Quick example, so you get what I’m saying. Since retiring, I’ve become a full-time artist = joy. I’ve accumulated so much art, I need to do something with it. So, I rented a couple of spaces at a local antique vendor mall = joy. One option to pay less commission is to work a few hours a month = not joy, but healthy. Otherwise, I truly would never leave the house. Says a lot about my personality.
Fast forward. I now work at the shop part-time to offset booth rent. (Just for your amusement, minimum wage in Tennessee is 7.50/hr.) So now dealing with people. Love the people I work with, BUT I hear their complaints, issues, whines, etc. etc. = not joy. I’m fine. I don’t need to work. I’m retired. I do art. I live in Tennessee. I have no gripes. = joy. But their gripes are now living in my head – not joy. Get it?
I literally see the shop differently because I get unsolicited input that resides in my head.
So this made me think. What’s taking up space in your head? What thoughts, feelings, or mental processes are occupying your mind and potentially causing mental clutter or distraction? It can be a recurring thought, an obsession, a worry, or even a feeling of being overwhelmed by a to-do list. It’s essentially anything that’s consuming your mental energy and preventing you from focusing on other things or being present in the moment.
Some things that come to mind are:
- Recurring thoughts or worries:
These can be persistent negative thoughts, anxieties, or ruminations that keep replaying in your mind; everything from I’m not good enough to why life is not as I expected.
- Overthinking or overanalyzing:
This involves excessive mental activity focused on a particular situation or problem, potentially leading to mental exhaustion. Ever have a fight with a friend/family member and you keep replaying what they said, or worse, what you should have said? Over and over and over.
- Unresolved issues or tasks:
A backlog of tasks, commitments, or unresolved conflicts can create a sense of mental pressure and clutter. Seriously, how many times can you reorder your to-do list? Or for me, I’ll commit to something and then spend way, way too much time mentally trying to find a way to back out gracefully.
- Difficult people or situations:
Engaging with challenging individuals or situations can lead to emotional and mental strain, taking up significant space in your head.
- Lack of mental clarity:
Feeling mentally foggy or unable to focus can be a sign that your mind is full of unresolved thoughts or emotions. That feeling of having so much to do that I think I need a nap.
- Emotional overwhelm:
Dealing with strong emotions, especially negative ones, can lead to a feeling of being mentally overwhelmed and depleted.
Essentially, anything that’s demanding your mental attention and preventing you from feeling calm, clear, and focused can be considered “taking up space in your head”.
I have a friend, no really a friend – not me, who becomes so overwhelmed processing and brain-debating an issue that she just shuts down, for days or weeks or more.
So, have you given this some thought? What is taking up space in your head?
Before I go further, I shared the idea for this blog with my husband. Now he has a lot of noise in his head. Always reading news, working with clients’ finances, juggling multiple projects, etc. And, if he is awake, the radio is on. When you talk about being present in the moment, this is not my husband. So, his response to this blog was, “I don’t have too much. Everything needs to be there!” He said somewhat defensively. Hmmmm.
Noise – it permeates our environment – internally and externally, causing anxiety, distraction, and detours from our calling. How can we possibly hear God with all this noise going on?
This internal noise is the voice inside us that constantly chatters. We speak to ourselves continually, creating clamor that drones on and on. Examples of internal noise could be:
- Thinking of what words to say in reply to a conversation.
- Belittling ourselves for a silly mistake.
- Repeating words to our hearts that someone from our childhood told us that are no longer true or never were true.
- Worry that we won’t get everything done or done in an acceptable manner, which may lead to rejection or ridicule.
- Reviewing our to-do list or rehashing an interaction that occurred hours or days before, instead of being in the present.
- Judging others or evaluating ourselves, comparing how we fit or don’t fit in, in an attempt to understand a situation from our frame of reference.
- Imagining the worst that might happen or rambling down a rabbit trail of unfounded scenarios.
- Pondering how life could be different or why things are the way they are.
Most of these monologues are not bad; they just distract us from fully listening and being fully aware of the present.
The internal noise stirs up inner anxiety or internal busyness. The constant churning of chitchat, the unrest of monitoring emotions, and the blare of our own thoughts distract us from God’s joy in the moment, being aware of love in the present, and hearing God’s voice throughout the day.
The major difficulty with internal busyness is that it never goes away. There are a lot of articles and books out there dealing with positive self-talk, but here are a few random thoughts on reducing the internal noise pollution.
- Turn off the radio and TV. It really is ok to sit in silence. If at first it feels awkward, you’ll get used to it.
- Be aware of where your input comes from. Who is speaking into your life? Is it edifying (enriching)? Co-workers, blogs, podcasts, social media, friends, family. You may need to separate from some of them as you work to guard your mind and heart.
- Set patterns of silence and stillness. Even if it’s just 15 minutes in the morning, sit in silence and invite God into your day.
- Read scriptures, write your prayers and current experiences in a journal. All these patterns open the door to go deeper.
- We all know – reduce cyberspace. The chatter of social media and endless rabbit trails of the Internet are distractions and create negative thought patterns. Turning down the volume of email chirps, phone notifications, and placing boundaries on usage creates more time to be with God.
- Reading often helps us hear God. Spending time with your Bible, an inspirational devotional and spiritual writings gives us new perspectives and helps us articulate what we are experiencing and offers new ideas to explore.
- Once again, recognize what is going on within your heart. Pay attention and name the feelings. Hear your own voice without the influence of others and the noise from outside. Just talk with Jesus. Don’t make it too complicated with churchy words and what you think you are supposed to say. Keep what is positive = joy. Toss out what isn’t healthy.
- Relieve yourself of your burdens. Tackle this challenging question: What takes you from God and blocks you from drawing near to him? Our egos love to maintain control. Remembering I am NOT God helps. I confess my urge to be my own director in life.
- Remain with God. Staying present to the moment and how God interacts with me throughout the day.
I don’t have all the answers to managing internal noise and busyness. I do know I am going to try to be more aware of its presence within me and how it is influencing how I feel, react, and process my life. I do know that the louder the internal noise, the less I hear God. The less I hear God, the more I seek external sources, which create internal noise. See how that works? Vicious circle. Quiet the noise. I hear God.
Soothing and slowing the inner space of my soul steadies and strengthens the outer space of my surroundings.
For God and you,
Deb Bostwick
Single’s Blogger