In case you haven’t heard it from me yet, Happy New Year!
Though, as usual, a lot has been going on since we veered into 2025, I can hardly believe we’re already heading into February. It’s been a while since I’ve actually penned one of these blogs. With our amazing uber-ministry partner Deb so ably having carried the load over these last couple of months, I’m hoping I can reengage well.
In my pastor role, as you might imagine, I regularly receive questions about many different things from you, dear readers. Ultimately, I love this and believe it’s one of the ways we can stay connected, growing and learning together.
Today, I thought I’d take a run at providing responses to some of the more common inquiries I’ve received and for all of you to “hear” my heart and maybe even feel compelled to ask a question of your own.
Be advised and rest assured, my responses are not likely to be all that could be said on any of the subjects, so I welcome dialogue on each and every one. If something doesn’t sound quite right or simply raises another question in your mind, please don’t hesitate to reach out, so we might engage in further one-to-one discussion, with the goal of bringing about better clarity and further understanding.
After all, shouldn’t that be a big part of why we’re here and what we’re about?
With that, here are some of your most asked questions and my responses (for now).
1. What is the purpose of Single Adult Ministries? If you look up the definition of the word, ministry, you’ll likely see it in one way or another described as service to God and to people in His name. Another source defines it as the act of serving or carrying out a specific function or role within a religious, spiritual or humanitarian context. And I believe that begins to get to the essence of what we’re trying to provide and accomplish through our Single Adult Ministries at North Coast. Our church’s mission statement is, “Making Disciples in a Healthy Church Environment.” As a ministry, we strive to accomplish this through “building community and providing clear next steps for Singles wanting to connect with God.”
2. Why isn’t the Pastor of the ministry a single adult? Setting aside for the moment which of those descriptors you may actually be questioning :-), I was, in fact, a single person for the first 26 years of my life (some of those as an alleged adult). Then, I was married for 26 years. And then, I found myself single again, as a result of unwelcomed separation and divorce, beginning in 2008. In 2017, God saw fit to allow me a “second chance” by bringing Katie into my life. We dated for 2-1/2 years before marrying in 2019. And, while I love and cherish the gift he’s given me in her, I will forever forward see myself first as single, unique and individual before the Lord.
3. What can you tell me about your Singles’ Ministry? What types of things does the ministry do? As is the case throughout North Coast, the lifeblood of our ministry flows through our weekly small group meetings that we call Life Groups. As the name implies, these are opportunities for (typically) 8-12 people (within our ministry-single adults) to get together, either in a host home or at the church on a weekly basis for 8-10 weeks at a time, with a facilitator and host guiding the group in talking through what was taught in the message from the weekend prior, using the fill-in-the-blanks note sheet and questions provided in the weekend bulletin as the basis for discussion.
Our Life Groups study God’s Word together and gain one another’s perspective on how it applies as we navigate life together. Within our Single Adult Ministries, we presently have 34 different, unique and interesting Life Groups, with meeting locations at or near each of our campuses. In addition to general groups (all-ages) we have Life Groups available for people ages 35-50 (Harbor 35/50), ages 50+ (Single Purpose) and Single Parent Families as well as for Dating/Engaged/Newly Married-Again couples and Widows/Widowers.
Additionally, as a ministry, our goal is to provide opportunities to serve together, build and engage in healthy community, and encounter Jesus through regular weekly social engagements, e.g., our First Friday gatherings, Pizza & Movie Nights, Game Nights and outdoor walks and hikes together.
4. How many people are a part of the ministry and what ages? Single Adult Ministries is a community for unmarried women and men (and “alumni” who’ve married from within and now continue to serve our ministry), age 35 and better. Today, just over 1,400 individuals subscribe to our mailing list, approximately 400 of whom are active in our Life Groups and other weekly programs and events. We love meeting and welcoming new people. Not everyone participates in every event, but many find more than one way to engage in community, and I think that’s healthy.
5. Why doesn’t the church offer more activities for singles that I like to participate in? Gosh, I’m (genuinely) so glad you asked! What is it that you’d like to do that we don’t presently offer? Does the activity you’re desiring align with our mission and purpose and, if so, would you be willing and able to play a part in bringing it about for some of the other members in our community? (Most of our programs and activities beyond Life Groups are brought forward, planned and executed by volunteer members of our ministry.)
6. Where can I find out more about what’s going on? It looks like you’re already subscribed to our Single Adult Ministries newsletter which is great. (If not and someone has simply shared this with you, you can subscribe via this link.) You can also connect with us by scanning the QR code below on your phone, bookmarking our webpage here and follow us on Facebook or Instagram. Feel free to share these links with your other single friends and invite them to join us.
7. Do you have to be a Christian to participate? No, all are welcome! But it’s worth noting, remembering and honoring that it is a Christian church that is sponsoring and providing for everything we do in the ministry. So, please don’t be surprised or in any way offended or put-off that we seek to “speak” Jesus; His teachings of love, grace, mercy and saving power as we live life together and encourage one another throughout each ministry activity we engage in.
8. Do you have to attend North Coast to be able to participate? Our church is one of very few in Southern California to offer and support a ministry community for Single Adults. While mostly attended by North Coasters, we also welcome participation by others who attend another church or don’t yet have a regular church affiliation.
9. What types of things does the ministry support in terms of discipleship? From the time our ministry community was first formed under the guidance of Pastor Mike Yearly, we have sought to help carry our Jesus’ great commission through North Coast Church’s specific mission of Making Disciples in a Healthy Church Environment. Specifically, within our Single Adult Ministries community, these include such disciplines as:
-
-
-
-
- Pleasing Christ (and representing Him well)
- Sexual Purity
- Using Our Gifts
- Guarding the Group
- “Off-the-Top Giving
- Regular Prayer Support
- Responding to Leadership
- Pleasing Christ (and representing Him well)
-
-
-
10. Do you have programs and events for singles at every North Coast Campus? While we have weekly Life Groups stationed at or near most every one of our campuses and our monthly scheduled walks and hikes are spread out throughout North County San Diego, presently each of our other ministry community programs and events take place at our centralized main campus in Vista. Just prior to the pandemic, we were very close to replicating several of our events at either our Carlsbad or San Marcos/Escondido campuses and we look forward to the day when we’ve grown enough again and have the volunteers to support such endeavors.
I hope and pray that you’ve found these responses helpful. Again, please reply and let me know what other questions you have and/or what else may be on your mind.
I love staying connected and love serving as pastor of our Single Adult Ministries and look forward to your feedback and seeing you again soon at one of our ministry community events.
Right here with you,
Terry